The first snowfall

#judedays, Child loss, Grief, Parenting

I don’t know why, but it always catches me by surprise.  The first snowfall of the season always takes my breath away – if only for a second.  It catches me off guard and lifts me into this awe and wonder – beautiful, cold snowflakes dancing all around, landing perfectly on the ground forming a white blanket.

And then it hits me.  It’s the first snowfall of the season and that same white blanket of cold snowflakes is covering my sweet Jude.  Instead of snow angels, snowmen and snowballs, there’s only a cold blanket of snow.   The thought of my sweet boy being covered in the cold hits my heart like the ice cold breeze hitting my face and it stings.  In that moment, the awe and wonder dissipates and all that’s left is sadness and the knowledge, that it’s only going to get colder from here on in.

another season without you….

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